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MelindaB

Reading Maketh a Full Man...

More to come...

Currently reading

The Discarded Image: An Introduction to Medieval and Renaissance Literature (Canto)
C.S. Lewis
Boys and Girls Learn Differently!: A Guide for Teachers and Parents
Michael Gurian, Terry Trueman, Patricia Henley
Ambition and Survival: Becoming a Poet
Christian Wiman
Deep River: The Life and Music of Robert Shaw
Keith C. Burris
Daring, Trusting Spirit
John De Gruchy
The Vatican Diaries: A Behind-the-Scenes Look at the Power, Personalities, and Politics at the Heart of the Catholic Church
John Thavis
The Whisperers: Private Life in Stalin's Russia
Orlando Figes

"Mom, I Hate My Life!": Becoming Your Daughter's Ally Through the Emotional Ups and Downs of Adolescence (A Hand-in-Hand Book)

"Mom, I Hate My Life!": Becoming Your Daughter's Ally Through the Emotional Ups and Downs of Adolescence - Sharon A. Hersh This book came from the library before the other Sharon Hersh books I've requested, so I'm digging into it. I am finding it to be a better book than "Packaging Girlhood" and "Reviving Ophelia" primarily because the author says plainly at the first, "I will not be presenting a plan to overthrow culture and turn back the tide of increasingly disturbing statistics and stories about teenagers.... This book is about developing a relationship with your daughter that enables you to confront together the challenges of helping her develop emotional maturity. In unrestricted conditional love, God gave you a daughter and made you a mother! The God-given bond between you and your child was created to be a place of growth and safety -- a haven in the storm."I already like the tone and approach of the book....... I'm really glad I found Sharon A. Hersh. After reading "Packaging Girlhood" and "Reviving Ophelia", books that explain in vivid detail the many damaging influences in the lives of young girls as they grow up, I was hoping there would be a book out that would address "what do you do?". The former books seem to focus on "we need to educate people that this is a wrong way to treat girls!" or "if only society would change!". These observations are not terribly specific or terribly practical. How do you change society? At the end of "Reviving Ophelia" there were some practical steps that the author listed.... but for the most part those books made me see what was happening yet provided little to actually DO.Sharon A. Hersh has found a way to do that real "little bit" that makes a difference. Told from the perspective of a Christian worldview, the author provides a foundation for you to become an ally alongside of your daughter, instead of just sitting and watching helplessly as your daughter runs the gauntlet of abuse from the media, school, and peers.I recommend the book very highly. First, it tells mothers that they should grow up and become adults. Do not live your adolescent life again as though you were dealing with your own mother when you are dealing with your young daughter. I say it again, "GROW UP!". Be a grown and mature woman so your daughter can grow up into emotional maturity. You, as the mother, are already supposed to be mature! Do not go to step 2 until you have dealt with step 1. Second, realize that as your daughter grows into emotional maturity she will swing back and forth between various levels of immaturity and maturity. Prepare for it, expect it, realize it is going to happen. As a mature woman, you should prepare to handle the times of immaturity without becoming petty or ungracious. Sacrifice, stand by, put up with difficulties from your daughter AS YOU RELY ON THE LORD TO HELP YOU. Teach your daughter ultimately to rely on the Lord, but also let her know specifically, verbally, often.... that you love her, you will love and support her forever, and you will never withdraw your love (unconditional love!). Thirdly, separate "who you are" from "who your daughter is". Let her be different from you. Don't be jealous, don't be angry, don't be petty.... help your daughter grow up into the mature woman that the Lord wants her to be. This might involve prayer on the part of the mother to be able to SEE her daughter for who the Lord wants her to be, and reject perhaps an unhappy desire for your daughter to be "just like me". So, I found this book to be very refreshing. I plan to read more of Hersh's books. Some of them sound redundant "Mom, I'm fat" and others.... but I find the overall attitude she has to be helpful and productive.